Getting to know you
In a world where social media tells us how to live we have started to loose the art of intuition and self awareness. I often hear people say they don't feel quite like themselves or they don't feel happy but can't put their finger on any particular thing. This led me to thinking about how our emotional self is thoroughly neglected.
Consider how your younger self around the age of 3 - 7 years of age embraced activities that made you happy. It was often things of simplicity. Laughing felt much easier, life felt much lighter and less complicated. Why then as adults do we find life much so much more consuming, serious and complex. The most obvious answer is that as we mature we are exposed to many things that shape and change us. With maturity comes responsibility and that in itself is a burden. Still, I go back to the younger self and can't but help feel there is something that we can tap into. Something that we left back in our younger years.
Consider how your younger self around the age of 3 - 7 years of age embraced activities that made you happy. It was often things of simplicity. Laughing felt much easier, life felt much lighter and less complicated. Why then as adults do we find life much so much more consuming, serious and complex. The most obvious answer is that as we mature we are exposed to many things that shape and change us. With maturity comes responsibility and that in itself is a burden. Still, I go back to the younger self and can't but help feel there is something that we can tap into. Something that we left back in our younger years.
I turned to social media, where the gurus of life share their wisdom with the many social sponges and soon realised that mindfulness and meditation which often includes a form of yoga practice is where the answer lies. This is what helps to guide someone who is feeling disengaged and disconnected from themselves. It also helps to promote longevity and health by reducing stress.
With great enthusiasm I embarked on diving into these practices to elevate my emotional state. After lengthy sessions, in different locations at different times of the day using different techniques I felt like a failure. Why was this not working for me. Why was I starting to feel that there must be something wrong with my brain. Scrolling through social media, I could see hundreds of images of women looking tranquil, restored and at peace with life and themselves. The yoga images also left me feeling estranged, I couldn't achieve any of the extreme poses that were often associated with wellness. I struggled to find images or encouragement for the woman, sitting in her car, in her uniform on her lunch break trying to meditate or the mother sitting with piles of housework around her in yesterday's tracksuit. The imagery associated with this activity is all focused around tranquil scenes of either sunset, sunrise, mountains, beaches wearing loose linen or showing a toned body. Last time I checked I didn't look like this and didn't have any fancy location to practice these techniques. It also felt slightly unachievable to do in the middle of a busy day, carving out 30 minutes to bookend your day is not always manageable. Yet, this is what works, thousands of people live their life this way and there is a thriving industry all built on the benefits of these health practices. Afterall most corporate companies draft in wellness sessions for their employees, so it must be valid. In my bias, I am also generalising a much wider problem with social media, presenting to us how things look for the camera and not in reality. I understand that making something attractive creates desire for this which is why the wellness industry is portrayed this way. This is not always helpful.
With great enthusiasm I embarked on diving into these practices to elevate my emotional state. After lengthy sessions, in different locations at different times of the day using different techniques I felt like a failure. Why was this not working for me. Why was I starting to feel that there must be something wrong with my brain. Scrolling through social media, I could see hundreds of images of women looking tranquil, restored and at peace with life and themselves. The yoga images also left me feeling estranged, I couldn't achieve any of the extreme poses that were often associated with wellness. I struggled to find images or encouragement for the woman, sitting in her car, in her uniform on her lunch break trying to meditate or the mother sitting with piles of housework around her in yesterday's tracksuit. The imagery associated with this activity is all focused around tranquil scenes of either sunset, sunrise, mountains, beaches wearing loose linen or showing a toned body. Last time I checked I didn't look like this and didn't have any fancy location to practice these techniques. It also felt slightly unachievable to do in the middle of a busy day, carving out 30 minutes to bookend your day is not always manageable. Yet, this is what works, thousands of people live their life this way and there is a thriving industry all built on the benefits of these health practices. Afterall most corporate companies draft in wellness sessions for their employees, so it must be valid. In my bias, I am also generalising a much wider problem with social media, presenting to us how things look for the camera and not in reality. I understand that making something attractive creates desire for this which is why the wellness industry is portrayed this way. This is not always helpful.
What works for me?
What works for me, was the question I asked myself and became the start of a wonderful journey of discovery. I told myself to forget what I had seen on social media and think for myself. How did my grandmother and the generations before her find their own happiness. They lived in harder times but seemed to be a more grounded generation. This was my starting place to look at finding activities that could be done at any point of the day. Different lengths of time, using different senses and brain activity. When you bring these together you become engaged, enthusiastic and emotional. And there we have it, captivation in the moment, being present. When I use the term emotional this doesn't mean upset or terfull but rather that an emotion on some level was felt such as joy, calmness, awe, amusement, love, surprise and gratitude.
In a nutshell
Don't restrict yourself to what the world tells you will bring you emotional enrichment. Learn to discover what ignites you and your inner child. My point is not to ridicule or criticise the wellness industry around meditation and mindfulness but rather to expand the narrow horizon it sits on. Many people I talk to have been put off by the way this is portrayed on social media as it feels terrifyingly unachievable. Instead realise you are unique and therefore your journey to emotional fulfillment needs to be just as unique.
You Become What You Believe - Oprah Winfrey
Grapevine Gossip - what others are saying
- "The Dark Side of the Wellness Industry"
- Reference: Forbes. (2020). Article by Serena Oppenheim.
- Summary: This article discusses how the wellness industry can perpetuate unrealistic standards and promote feelings of inadequacy, which may contribute to stress and anxiety.
- "The Problem With the Wellness Industry"
- Reference: Psychology Today. (2018). Article by Jennifer Rollin, MSW, LCSW-C.
- Summary: This article highlights the potential harm caused by the wellness industry's focus on diet culture, unrealistic beauty standards, and the promotion of unproven or pseudoscientific treatments.
- "The Wellness Industry: Coming of Age"
- Reference: The Lancet. (2017). Editorial.
- Summary: This editorial discusses how the wellness industry's emphasis on individual responsibility for health can overlook systemic factors and contribute to guilt and anxiety.
- "Wellness Culture and Its Discontents"
- Reference: The New Yorker. (2019). Article by Jia Tolentino.
- Summary: This article explores the paradox of the wellness industry, which promotes self-care while often exacerbating feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy.
Know Yourself
Find one inner thread that ignites a positive emotion in yourself and start to unravel it to discover your own wellness prescription